Thursday, December 6, 2012

Etiquette-- Kids: To invite or Not to invite

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The debate that started a million tiny squabbles amongst family everywhere. Kids verses no kids. People take this issue very personally, so it’s important that whatever decision you do it respectfully and tactfully. Here are a few questions to ask yourself to help you with this tough decision. 

Is your venue suited for children? Okay, so if you are having a super fancy ta-da at a uber chic hotel or urban loft it might be best to leave the kids at home. But any outdoor occasion would be perfect for children and you could even provide coloring materials or various easy and clean crafts to keep the little ones entertained. 

What time of day is your wedding? If you are having an evening wedding it’s smart to take into account the sleeping habits of the wee ones. So if your wedding starts later, you might want to cut out the munchkins. Lots of tired and unhappy babes off schedule does not sound like fun!! Plus, you definitely do not want your vows overshadowed by screaming chillins. 

What is the vibe of your event? If you want a very chill, family vibe then you should definitely invite the lil’ ones because kids will keep it fun and light. On the other hand, if you really want an elegant party with drinks and a really sophisticated feel, then perhaps children would be best left at home with a sitter. 

Do you need to cut numbers? Are you crunching the numbers something fierce?? If you are really needing to trim the guest list then perhaps you should start with the miniature people. While little, they still count as a guest and even with a less expensive child’s plate they still cost money. 

Inviting some and not others? The queen of all things fabulous Martha Stewart suggests keeping your decision uniform and not picking and choosing certain children, but instead have an age limit, 10 and over, 18 and over, etc. 

Is it a destination wedding? If you are far from home it’s going to be difficult to ask family and friends to find sitters for your wedding. You could always offer childcare, have guests who wish to use your provided childcare rsvp for their little folks and hire 2-3 sitters to watch them based on numbers. If you are really against it, know that many people might not be able to make it to your wedding.

So these are just a few little ways to think about what’s best for your day... All that to say, you have to go with your gut. It’s about what YOU want for your day, not your sister with 4 kids or your bitter child hating single bridesmaid. You make the decision. The queen of all things polite, Martha Stewart, suggests whatever your decision you call the families with children and explain your choice. Sorry, Martha said it! And you DO NOT argue with Martha!!! 


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