1. Accept that hiccups will happen. The sooner you realize that details might change and issues will arise the easier it will be to deal with them. The best thing you can do is take deep breaths and let it go. You’ve spent months and months planning and now you get to enjoy all of your hard work. Don’t let the fact that there are crab cakes instead of crab rangoon ruin your night. Odd example, I know. 
2. Hire a wedding planner. The joys of hiring a planner are too many to count, but one of the best things is that you don’t generally have to hear about any of the hiccups, so if you are prone to a good freak out you should definitely consider hiring a wedding planner. Their job is to make your day glorious... so they’re not going to tell you that the flowers arrived 10 minutes before the ceremony or that the first batch of crab cakes were burnt to a crisp... there I go again with the crab cakes.  
3. Make sure to eat and keep alcohol to a minimum before the ceremony. This is huge. You must eat!! I don’t know about you, but when I’m hungry I get angry... I get HANGRY. Not to mention you have no energy or can even develop full blown headache. This is not the way you should spend your wedding day. Under no circumstances will you sub alcoholic beverages for food because a drunk bride is never a calm bride. My best advice is to have a giant berry non-dairy smoothie with tons of protein for your meal. You will feel full and satisfied, but not super bloated. And if you must pre-game your wedding I highly suggest alternating between drinks and water. 
4. MOST IMPORTANT-Never lose sight of what the day is about. Always keep in mind what this day represents. This is the day that you choose to spend eternity with your best friend. It’s literally the most glorious day ever. If you just remember why you are there then everything else just seems to fade away. We all want a perfect wedding day, but if you simply take the time to appreciate what is going on you will definitely be able to keep your cool if a mini-disaster pops up with those pesky crab cakes. 

1. I think the number one reason is redundancy. Don't you want your wedding to be unique? Pinterest is a fabulous place to gather initial ideas, but can you take it to the next level so Pinterest lovers are pinning YOUR wedding photos? A wedding planner and event designer can help you recreate and elaborate on your design ideas. 
2. It’s probably more expensive than you think. When’s the last time you ventured into the craft store to buy, I don’t know, scrapbook supplies or paint? That stuff isn’t cheap. Not at all. And when you start trying to arrange your own flowers (which may or may not be in season), find the 20 vases that you need, buy the satin ribbons, rent your own linens... etc. You get it. On top of the crafting being expensive, most of these stunning weddings you are seeing are super high dollar affairs, so you have to be realistic about your budget and a planner can help you achieve your look within your budget. We are THAT good. 
3. It doesn’t set its brilliant ideas up on the tables, nor does it clean those ideas up. Lauren says "So the best part of my wedding was the part when it was over, it was over. My family took the flower arrangements and we were outta there. My family and friends weren’t stuck cleaning up the room. My ah-mazing planner took care of it all. She coordinated with the vendors before the wedding, so that the only thing I had to do was show up. Pinterest does not take care of this." And you know who her wedding planner was right--yep, you guessed it! Yours truly! :) But seriously folks, if you really knew how much day of running around, coordinating and planning that it takes to get your day up and running smoothly, remain smooth and then clean up, you would be amazed. There was one wedding that had so much set up and clean up that we arrived around 8am and didn't leave until 4am. Are you prepared to put your hair and makeup on the back-burner while you oversee and aid in the installation of flowers or run back through your sparklers to pack up the guest book, gifts and strip tables of linens? NO, and you shouldn't have to, nor should your family and friends have to. They too are there to enjoy your day. 
4. Too much of a good thing, can look like too much. There are a ton of beautiful ideas on Pinterest. A TON. And in my mind, requires a great deal of editing. You want to have balance. You don’t want your wedding to look like a Pinterest board. 
5. Once you’re married you are gonna be stuck with a ton of junk. Congrats, you’re married. Now you 12-18 giant vases and 80 votive holders that you have to store in your house. Sure you can try to get some cash back on craigslist, but don’t expect to get all of your money back. And if are like Lauren, after your wedding you move into a 450 square foot apartment, you definitely WILL NOT have the room for those. Sometimes your planner or florist might be willing to buy some of your items if craigslist isn't an option, but keep in mind that trends change and therefore a lot of what you used for your wedding might not be "in" next year. Therefore, there might be very few items they will want/need. What will you do with them now? Trust me, storing them in your cabinets and garage only upset your dear hubby each time he goes to find something and knocks over a vase. 
6. No offense, but it might look a hot mess. So have you ever seen a craft project and thought... that looks like... a craft project??? Weellllllll, is your wedding day really the day to summon up your inner Martha Stewart? Isn’t it best to leave this to a professional? I don’t know about you, but I sure think so! And I don’t say this because the blog is called “The Savannah Wedding Planner,” I say it because crafts are usually fun in the beginning, but can very quickly become a flipping disaster. And when you decide to emboss 300 place cards because you saw it on Pinterest or whatever else you think would be “so super cute” after a few hours you will be over it. I swear. 
7. 99% ( a number we completely made up) of the cute wedding photos on Pinterest are of weddings that most definitely had a wedding planner. Our numbers may be off, but I assure you all of these complicated and stunning set ups with curtains and chandeliers and lanterns hanging from trees, tables with giant flower arrangements and 20 different linens and adorable menus... these were NOT diy weddings. 

As most of you know I don’t care much for wedding etiquette... I think most of it is antiquated and plain old silly, but there is something that I am a firm believer in... and that’s NOT blabbering constantly about where you are registered... And even furthermore, putting anything in your invitation that suggests where you are registered is just beyond tacky!!!! I think that sometimes people do it thinking they are making life easier for their guests, but I think it can easily be misconstrued as only being concerned with gifts and that is just so not-fabulous. When doing research on the post I found that most people agree with me... but just in case you don’t believe me...

The Knot.com’s Q&A states, “ ...gift information should be included with your wedding invitations. Tell your wedding party, parents, and close friends where you are registered, and let them fill guests in. Guests know that they are supposed to ask your mom, your maid of honor, or even you where you're registered. Putting it in the invite is still considered bad form because it suggests that the gift is more important than the potential guest.”

Peggy Post, an expert on etiquette says, “Gift registry information should never be included in a wedding invitation. Tradition still holds that the practice of including lists of gift registries with wedding invitations is considered tacky and inappropriate. Why? It puts more emphasis on the gift and less on the request that the recipient join you on your special day. Gift registries are wonderful tools. But get the word out the old-fashioned way: word of mouth (and don't email gift registry information, even if you're listed on a registry Web site). For shower invitations, however, it's okay to include wedding gift registry information -- a list of stores, mail-order catalogs, or Internet addresses -- on the invitation if the hostess prefers.”

Kristen Klett over at WeddingAces.com is also on my side saying, “While we like to consider ourselves modern gals, there are some new trends that we just can’t get behind.  The practice of including registry or other gift preferences on one’s wedding invitation is still a big ‘no-no’ in our book.“Now come on!” you might say.  “Everyone knows that you’re supposed to give gifts at a wedding and aren’t we making things easier on our guests by providing them with our registry information?”Nope.  No way.  Even on occasions where gifts are appreciated, or even expected, in our opinion it’s just plain tacky to imply that you require a guest to bring a gift as “admission” to your celebration.  Weddings are an excellent example of “expected” gift-giving occasions.  And while we certainly appreciate and take advantage of the convenience of gift registries, etiquette dictates that references to our gift preferences must be carefully chosen and discreet.

So, yes. I hate to break it to you... I’m right. If you are having a shower, those in charge of throwing in are more than welcome to list the stores you are registered at to get the word out. If you have a wedding website, make a page devoted to pointing your friends and family to your registered stores... Just avoid putting that information in your invitations... I know how old school wedding etiquette has become, but this is just one rule I like to see followed.

Lauren

Q: We want to reserve a square in Savannah for our wedding but are worried about the weather because we hear it rains a lot in April. Can you help me come up with different options just in case it does rain? --Avery

A: Hi Avery, Mother nature is always unpredictable and I am a terrible gambler. Hence why I had my wedding indoors…but always wanted to have it outside. Maybe on my vow renewal in a few years!! But there are options if you have one of Savannah’s beautiful squares on hold for your wedding:

1. Reserve a backup. There are a number of churches, hotels with empty ballrooms, or indoor facilities that will allow you to reserve their space as a back up option.

Pros: You will have a separate space for your ceremony that is free of rain/wind that can easily be set up with enough advanced notice that day.

TIP: as long as you cancel the park before your time starts, you will get your park permit fee back and will not have to pay for your security.

Cons: You will incur another fee for the additional facility and you or your wedding planner will need to arrange for all vendors to delivery/set up at the new site.

2. Rent a tent. If you do not have a wedding planner be sure to contact your rental company ahead of time to make sure there is enough inventory for your wedding!

Pros: You will still be able to have your ceremony outdoors surrounded by the amazing oak trees, you and your guests will remain dry!

Cons: The tent can be expensive…and the rental company will need more time to set up your rentals to include the tent now. Regardless if the weather changes, you will still have to use the tent. If the wind is bad or if there is lighting, a tent will not be sufficient for guests or your safety and you will have no choice to but to hold off on the time of the ceremony or move to your reception site. This could add additional fees onto your officiate, ceremony musicians, security, etc if your time you have contracted with your vendors goes over and i have seen ceremony musicians leave because they had

TIP-Extend your park permit and security to cover about 6 hours. The decision to put up a tent will need to take place early AM to allow enough time for the rental company to schedule this. 

3. Use your reception location.  If you have a wedding planner, then get with them to have them set up the details and arrangements with your reception site. If you do not, you will need to contact the reception site ahead of time to ensure they can accommodate your request since they would be the ones turning over the space. If your reception site is large enough, we have been known to separate the space to allow to two distinct visions (ceremony/reception) without guests hanging around waiting. 

Pros: You will not incur any additional costs since you already have your reception space booked. You can wait until the last minute to decide this but you will still lose your permit fee, security and your rentals….but at least you know you waited until the very last minute to give the weather a chance to pass!

Cons: You will either have to adjust your layout and decor to make the room look like a ceremony site instead of the reception site, or you can just have a place for you to stand with your bridal party and your guests to stand around you. If you pick the first option, you will need to give your venue enough time to turn back over the space. Generally, our team needs about an hour to do this…(a good time to have a cocktail hour)

Hope this helps! But remember if it does rain, “It is harder to untie a wet knot” and if it makes you feel better…there was not only rain but a tornado on my wedding day! HEY it is a good story for later on…you have to laugh it off. The most important thing is you are marrying the love of your life. All the other things…do not matter.

xoxoxox

Morgan

 

Question: When my mother and I were talking about thanking guests for coming to the wedding on the day and she thinks I should have a traditional receiving line. I hate the idea of standing around for 20 minutes shaking everyone's hand and hugging people I have never met and wouldn't know when to do it during the day so it doesn't interfere with the other activities of the day. What do I do? --Lynn

Answer: Hi Lynn. Congratulations on your engagement and upcoming wedding. I think the big question to answer first is how large of a wedding are you having? I would NEVER suggest a receiving line if you have over 50+ guests. You are correct-it would take FOREVER to get through and guests would be standing in line for a long time. However, if your numbers are under 50, then if you want to save the time you would have used during the reception going around to tables, then sure! Regardless of the option you chose, proper etiquette says that you should thank your guests and show your gratitude face-to-face, that they have attended either by thanking them in a receiving line or at some point during your reception.

With that said, here are some tips that help from the knot.

When & Where?

Generally the receiving line is formed immediately following the ceremony or at the beginning of the reception. You'll want to take spatial constraints into consideration when choosing where to line up so that family and bridal party members aren't standing on top of each other and guests have room to move in a smooth, orderly procession (which in turn makes the line go faster so you can all get on to the party). Proper ventilation is also crucial to avoid sweaty brows and swooning bridesmaids. The most commonly used ceremony site areas include the hallway or vestibule at the head of the aisle, outside the entry doors, down the front steps, or on the front porch. At your reception site the options are many, depending on the party space: consider the cocktail lounge, the lobby, just outside the doors leading into the main room, or the reception room itself, perhaps on the dance floor. Ultimately, pick a spot where you and your guests can stand comfortably for the duration.

Who Stands in it?

Traditionally, the bride's parents -- as hosts -- head the receiving line and are first to greet guests, followed by the bride and groom and then the groom's parents. Many lines we've seen also include the entire bridal party (if there's room), and sometimes even grandparents (if they're able). Today, however, with more couples contributing to or paying for their own weddings, the lines have blurred (so to speak). The couple may wish to stand alone, especially if the majority of guests are their friends, or they may stand with just the moms while the dads circulate among and welcome the crowd during the cocktail hour.

Divorced & Remarried Parents

This may be one of the stickier situations you'll encounter when orchestrating the big day, and the resolution often depends on the relationships between the relevant parties. If your parents are divorced, they should not stand next to one another in line -- even if they are sharing hosting duties -- as this gives the impression that they are still a couple. Instead, place Mom on one side of you and the groom, then the groom's parents, then Dad. If this arrangement doesn't sit well, consider placing another family member or an honor attendant between them. And what about stepparents? Should you include them too? That depends: Do you have a good relationship with them? Is your mom/dad capable of sharing this duty with your stepmom/dad with civility and grace? You should strive to make everyone feel as comfortable as possible. If this arrangement gets the green light, simply have your father stand with his new wife, and your mother with her new husband. This way guests will understand the relationships.

Introductions All Around

The receiving line is where your hosting duties as the bride and groom kick off. It'll no doubt be a whirlwind of faces, but as much as possible you should introduce your new spouse and your parents to all the guests they have not yet met. First names and the guests' relationships to you should suffice. Likewise all guests should take it upon themselves to offer this same information as introduction to attendants and family members whom they've never met as they proceed down the line; simply shake hands, offer congratulations, and keep moving. The bride and groom need only accept everyone's hugs, kisses, and best wishes, and thank them for coming. It's that simple. And yes, you'll end up with a lot of lipstick on your cheeks, but fear not -- you're allowed to make a bathroom pit stop before heading to the party.

Congratulations first and foremost! Try to sit back for a few weeks and truly enjoy the experience of being engaged! Then when you are ready to start your planning, here is a great “get you started” guide to being newly engaged!

A majority of the years engagements take place during these holidays and the average engagement time is 12 months. This is a good amount of time to allow for all planning and decisions without the added stresses of rushing or loosing the vendors you want to hire. With that said, here are the things that need to happen within the first month or so of being engaged to ensure you are going to have everything you envisioned your wedding to be and more!

1. Announce your engagement: Let everyone know that you gotten engaged! Etiquette wise, believe it or not, there is an order to do this.

First: Let your parents, siblings and grandparents know. DO NOT SEND A TEXT MESSAGE! Give them a call! This is a very special occasion and they probably want to ask you all the fun details! Then you can send an email or an engagement announcement  to extended friends and family.

{TIP: Keep in mind, when you send engagement announcements, those that you send them to, will likely expect an invite to the wedding. Be sure they do not mistake that for an invitation though!}

Then: Publish an Announcement in Your Local Newspaper. Their requirements are usually listed online. It should tell you if they accept pictures, have any specific guidelines, deadlines, fees, or regulations about the announcement.  Typically, announcements include information on the two of you, including career and education credentials, and your parents names. If your parents live in a different town, you should also include their hometowns.

2. Pick a date: Pick Carefully!

There are a number of things you need to consider when picking a date:

• In Season vs. Off Season: These months will vary depending on which area of the world you pick. For Savannah weddings, Hilton Head weddings, Jekyll Island weddings, and Charleston weddings the in season months are: April, May, June, September, October and lately November is becoming quite popular. But if you go to DC and your in season months would be different due to weather and tourism peak times. But the biggest thing to note is that your wedding costs will be less during the off season.
• Location: What kind of atmosphere do you want for your wedding and guests? Do you want historic homes, museums, water access, mountains, etc? You should research the locations you are debating to the fullest. If you want to get married at a winery, unfortunately Savannah wouldn't be the area for you! However, if you want ocean, history, charm and beautiful weather…then Savannah or the Low Country is for you!
• Weather: If you want the festivities to take place mainly outside, then I wouldn't recommend humid , rain prone, or cold months! Every city and location is different, so do a little research on what the average weather report is for each month.
• Holidays: Will it be easy for your guests to travel? This can go both ways. On the up side, they would have more time to travel and make a mini-vacation out of it. but on the downside they can incur more costs due to high travel times.

3. Hire a wedding planner: A No Brainer!

The average wedding takes 250+ hours to plan and this day in age with the hectic schedules we keep, who has the time to do a thorough job? Think about how much you get paid for an hour of work, now think about how much you get paid per hour. By the time you add up all the time you spent researching vendors, sending emails, making phone calls, and tracking details you could have paid for 4 planners! As a wedding planner,   I not only offer my expertise and share priceless information and knowledge with you, I am a sounding board, friend and liaison when it comes to vendor details and negotiations. It is very hard planning a wedding from another city in which you are not familiar. How are you supposed to know, of the hundreds of vendors listed, which ones will provide you with the quality service you deserve?  Wedding planners are also privy to discounts, that you as a private party wouldn’t normally be entitled to, based on the strong and constant working relationships they share with vendors. Thus, saving you even more money!  At the very least you should have a wedding planner for your day of. The last thing you want to think about when you are getting ready in your room, is whether or not the cake was delivered and having to get up extra early to lay linens and set your place settings. Just as you want to enjoy your wedding day, as do your friends and family. You want a professional who has experience with all the things that can and will go wrong, handle the most important day in your life.

4. Establish your Budget: Know your limits!

Before you can really start any type of planning, you really need to discuss this touchy subject with prospective contributors to your wedding budget. Your wedding planner can help you establish what you spend and which vendors will fit in your budget, based on what you have envisioned for your big day.

This will help determine decisions like:

• Reception space options (Hall, Ballroom, Museum, Historic Home, etc)
• What type of chairs you can rent (plastic, wood, chivari, etc)
• Band vs. DJ
• Passed Hors d’oeuvres vs. a Sit down Dinner
• Bar options
• Linen options
• and much more!

You really need a number in your head before you begin to book vendors. You do not want to be stuck looking and falling in love with venue spots that do not fit in your budget!

{TIP: Depending on which location you pick for your wedding (beach, mountains, east coast, west coast, etc) will fluctuate in the price per person (PPP) number. On average you should plan to spend}

5. Start compiling your guest list: Be reasonable!

Knowing how many guests might attend will help determine what venues you can consider and how much you can plan to spend per person.

I don't have to tell you that the less guests you have, the farther your budget will go. You know that! Wouldn’t you rather the fun details like beautiful chargers, luxurious linens, lush floral decor, dramatic draping, amazing lighting and one more course to your meal, rather than 50 more guests? I know I WOULD! But, I can tell you that having a large number of guests is exhausting for you and your fiancé. You will spend most of the night making sure you talk to each guest and less time dancing and enjoying the festivities! It is no fun talking to people you have met once in your life when you were 10 not to mention you are paying a pretty penny for them to be there.

{TIP: Keep in mind this general rule of thumb--If your wedding is an out of town wedding 60-70% of guests will attend. If your wedding is an in town wedding, 70-80% of guests will attend. This number with the economy with the way it is now tends to lean more to the lower end of these numbers and holiday weekends will also affect your attendance.}

6. Start your wedding website:The ultimate information source for guests.

The best way to keep your guests informed and actively involved in your wedding is to create a wedding website. This day in age, with technology at everyone’s fingertips, it is easy to make a one-stop-shop for your family and friends. There are a number of free wedding website options and ones that have a month to month or yearly fee. Depending on the features you are looking for out of your website, will determine  the price you will end up paying. I suggest you find one that has an online RSVP option, external links to your registries, enough pages to add for hotel, travel, timing, things to do, and gallery information. My favorites are Wedding Window, Wedding Wire, and MyWedding. Check back next week for a more in depth overview and comparison of the most popular wedding website options to help you make an informed decision!

Photo by Thistleberry Press

7. Send out Save the Dates: A smart move.

I recommend, if you are planning a type of destination wedding where most of your guests will be attending from out of town, sending out a “Save the Date”.  Sending this card will allow your guests to make travel plans, hotel arrangements and make sure they mark their calendar to ensure no other future plans coincide with your wedding day! The more time they have to plan, the better the chance they will be able to come.

{TIP: If you have a wedding website, be sure to add that to the card. Providing information on hotels, important times, travel options, and giving them access to wedding registries, will help you in the long run as well!}

{TIP: You might want to include some travel brochures and visitor’s packets of the city you will be getting married in. This might entice your guests to make a mini vacation out of your wedding weekend and will prompt more guests to attend. Your wedding planner can help you gather these from a the local CVB.}

I know it seems overwhelming, but it never hurts to get started early and ask for help! planning your wedding is supposed to be fun and stress free and I assure you, having a wedding planner will guarantee this!  So ask me how I can help you love every minute of your planning in a luxurious fashion!

 

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Yesterday I wrote about the “Do’s” to popping the big questions, but today are the “Don’ts”, which might be even more important in my mind! Read on and let me know if i have left anything important out!??!

Do it on Another Important Day

You know that kid in school that happens to share a birthday with Christmas? Yeah..you know where I am going with this…..Make your proposal unique in all aspects of the word, including the day you do it! Holidays and birthdays are off limits! They are separate special occasions and your proposal should be as well!

Over Do It

Don't lose site of what you are doing and the meaning behind it. Smoke and mirrors are still smoke and mirrors! Let it come from the heart and don’t do something that isn’t a reflecting of the two of you.

Do it in Public

I am sure you have been to a baseball game where during the 7th inning the words “Patty, will you marry me” run across the jumbotron…well, not only is it tacky what if she is in the bathroom when it flashes up on the screen? I mean come on…do you really want thousands of people watching you propose to the woman of your dreams? I know what you are saying…”but Morgan, we share a love of baseball, it would be perfect!” NOOO! If you love baseball (which I do-GO METS) then ask the stadium to do a private tour and on the field, get on your knee! This is supposed to be something intimate and private! Which brings me to……

In Front of Family

It is not a family affair! It is a private affair. The moments following a proposal are very private and intimate and do you really want family watching or sharing in your moment? If you want to involve your family, arrange to meet up with everyone afterwards! It presents a perfect time to share the news!

Hide it in Food

As much as you want to…refrain! What if you lose it? What if she chomps down on it? A broken tooth or missing ring doesn’t bode well for you or what you are trying to accomplish before the end of the night! Trust me here!

Jump the Gun

Courtship is an important part of a relationship. You want to be 100% sure that the answer is going to be “Yes” and you want to be sure that you are making the right decision as well. You two should know each other…and know that this is the step you want to take forward together. You don’t want to have to replay this moment again…with anyone else or her for that matter!

Drink too much

While you might need a drink to take the edge off..don't let it get out of hand. you need to be on your best behavior and full capacity when "asking her to marry you”. The memory of you slurring your words or passing out isn’t on her list of fond memories and you might get an answer you weren’t expecting!

With that said, take a breath (maybe a drink) and relax……GOOD LUCK and enjoy taking the plunge…it only gets better from here!

We cannot wait to hear your story!

The MGE Team

So you want to “Pop the question” to the love of your life? And…you are searching online to find advice…well, you have come to the right place! Up until this point, the most important day in your life might have been when you walked across the stage at your college graduation, or maybe when you landed that dream job you were interviewing for or maybe even when you became the proud owner of a 69’ Mustang. Well none of that will compare to what you are about to do. That being said, here are the ultimate guidelines for the “Do’s” to proposing!

Be Certain

The ONLY answer you should or want to here is “YES”….This is not an instance when you don’t want to be unsure of the answer you are expecting to receive. This could turn out to be upsetting and humiliating for both of you and that is no way to end the evening or continue the relationship. Avoid the awkward situation by wading the waters and casually discussing the future of your relationship. (But…don’t wait until just before you want to propose!)

The Element of Surprise

She should in no way be expecting or anticipating this! This is part of the game right! You want to sweep her off her feet and take her by surprise. SO…keep it quite! No one needs to know what or when you will do it. Don’t facebook or twitter it, tell family and friends, or leave receipts laying around. If she gets suspicious, throw her off or even lie (this is the only time I condone this!)

Talk With Her Parents

While it is not necessary this day in age, to ask for permission, it is always a good idea to talk with her parents about your intentions.  Asking for their blessing is not only nice to have, it is form of respect.

Be Unique

You don't want to be a copy cat! You want this to be a moment that you both remember forever! The more thought you put into it, the more it will mean to her.   After all this is one of the stories that you will be asked and tell more than any other in your lifetime together! Make it count. if you are stuck and just don't know what to do, that is OK because some wedding planners offer services now, where they will help you plan this momentous occasion with you!

Make it Personal

When you think of how to ask your girlfriend make them feel like the whole affair was designed around them! Have her favorite flowers, food or wine with you, invite her family to join you as it is happening, bring her to a spot that means the most to the both of you, cook her special meal…you get the picture! And most importantly add more to the “Will you marry me?” Start the proposal off by telling her why you want to marry her or what you love most about her and then ask the ever so important question.

Practice.Practice.Practice.

More than likely you are going to be so nervous! You need to think about what you want to say, write it down, practice in front of a mirror, use a tape recorder, say it to a friend…whatever you can do to make you feel more confident in asking. These words should flow right out of your mouth without hesitation! Practice does make perfect!

Get on your Knee

Every little girl has dreamt about this day. She has seen it in movies, read about it in books and heard many stories all of which include, YOU getting down on one knee and proposing to her. While this might seem corny or even petty to you, this is something that means the world to her!

Ask the Question

Getting on your knee and showing her a ring doesn’t imply that you want to marry her and it shouldn’t be a given when you do so. You need to ask her “THE” question.  These words are indicating you are ready to take the next step in your relationship and you want her to be your wife. She shouldn’t have to assume anything and hearing it from you are words that will linger in her head and heart for the rest of her life.

Pictures are a Must

You want to be sure you have memories of this amazing moment in your life! Aside from your wedding and children’s birth, this will be a one of the most important memories that you will share with friends and family for years! Take it from me, I have personal experience with this one! When my husband asked me to marry him, he didn't think to have a camera or anyone take pictures afterwards. The only thing we could get our hands on was this little Polaroid camera that the restaurant had and the picture was so blurry and small it didn’t even matter. I was so upset that the restaurant let me take the plate home so i could photograph it but we still had no picture of us! Arrange to bring your camera and hand it someone to take a picture, have friends and family join you right after, or have a professional photographer there to capture it all! Whatever you do, get pictures!

Tune in tomorrow for the every so important “Don’ts” to popping the question!

It is true that not every couple or every budget is a good fit for hiring a wedding planner. But the question most debated is just that. So I thought I would ask a few questions to help readers determine the right answer for them and their wedding. 

Ask yourself the following questions and track your answers:

• You don’t have 250+ additional work hours to devote to research, meetings, phone calls, etc. on top of your work schedule and in substitution for your free time, do you?
• You don’t have a friend/family member/contact in the area you wish to marry in, that will have the inside scoop as to who the best and most reliable vendors are?
• Does the decision making process slow and sometimes tedious when more than one person is contributing input?
• Do you have to mediate between two or more families when it will come to wedding details?
• Do you stress easily?
• Does you need some help pulling together a fluid and precise design aesthetic?
• Do you want to relax and enjoy the wedding planning process?
• Would you like someone besides yourself or a family member to focus on the details of the wedding day?

If you have answered “Yes” to more than 2 of these questions, then hiring a wedding planner might be the best route for you to ensure your are relaxed throughout the entire process and making the most of your time! This day in age time is money…and you don’t want your job or your wedding to suffer.

My professional opinion as a wedding planner/design and a past bride myself, is that the LEAST you should gift yourself, is a person to run the wedding day and finalize details. We offer our clients “WEEK OF” planning services during OFF SEASON months, where we come in one month prior and tie up loose ends, create timelines and run the wedding day. There are other planners that offer this service year round and I highly recommend you make room in your budget for peace of mind!

While not every package or wedding planner offers the same services, be rest assured there is someone for everyone. Maybe if you cannot afford a full service package, but you know that if you had a good head start on the right vendors in the area and ensuring someone to finalize details and run the day, will work for your budget.

Morgan

  Okay, so we’ve all been there... we go to pick up our beautiful... clear throat... bridesmaids dress that you’ve been expertly measured for... clear throat... only to find that it’s 15 sizes too big! ugh.  It’s like an industry created to make you angry and to keep you paying until you actually start to hate the bride. Speaking of bride, they get your sizes jacked up too, all while you pay a boatload to get a “custom” gown, which is no more custom than an off the rack creation. So, here is my little insiders guide into getting a gown that fits.

For the Bride:

Okay, so here’s factoid #1. They tell you your gown is custom and it’s all just for you. Wellllll, that’s not entirely true. The sizing for most wedding gowns is similar to bridesmaids, they take your measurements and order you a gown based on your largest part. And then the gown goes into production. Now, with this type of gown you can usually make changes, which would indeed make it custom, but you would for sure be charged. 

#2. Wedding gowns are expensive. True story. Alterations are also very expensive. Also true. The only way to guarantee that your gown will come in perfectly fitted to your body is to get a muslin first. It is basically a mock version of your dress made with muslin, a cheap fabric, that they pin, hem, fit perfectly to you then based on that model, make your gown. They range in price from 300-500 dollars, which sounds expensive, but think of it as paying for your alterations ahead of time.

#4. So if you aren’t down for the muslin, you can have your gown’s hem pre-hemmed. This is usually 150 or so dollars. It’s definitely the way to go if your dress has a beautiful hemline. Think about it, if you have a stunning hemline you can’t just hack it off, but instead you have to raise the hemline from the waist, which is nutty expensive and sometimes not possible.

#4. Don’t be surprised if the sample size you try on fits perfectly, then when your dress comes it’s a wee bit snug. A sample is tried on by size 0’s and size 16‘s and a popular style can be tried on hundreds of times in a week. So basically what I am saying is, they get stretched out. It’s usually not much, so if you still can’t fit in it comfortably by wedding week than it can probably be let out.

For the Bridesmaids:

#1. Now, the sales folk don’t ever seem to care as much about the poor bridesmaids dresses. They begrudgingly take your measurements, for a gown that’s gonna be huge, then they eagerly charge you three hundred dollars for it. So, know your rights. You can request what size they order you, but it’s true that the store will not be held accountable if you order the wrong size. I’ve actually knew a bridal consultant, who threw a fit when they tried to order her a size 8, so she got a 6... and that 6 was so tight that she couldn’t sit down... sooooo tread lightly my friends.

#2. The bridesmaids gown sizes are based on a very basic set of measurements. Bust, natural waist, and hip. That’s it. So, whichever is your biggest spot, well that’s the size they are gonna order for you. Now, for the ladies with the ample bosoms, sometimes you are just stuck because you have to get a top that fits, so i generally insist on going with the best size for your ladies. If you have a large booty and a disproportionally small mid-section and bust, then you can get away with a lot more. As long as your dress doesn’t have a clingy skirt, I would suggest going with your bust/waist measurement for the size. 

#3. This might sounds like common knowledge, but you can base a lot on the sample. Samples are usually a 6 or 8, make sure you look!! So, if it fits perfectly and they try to order you a bigger size, laugh in their faces and order the sample size. If it’s huge and they tell you that, that is your recommend size, once again feel free to laugh... in their face. The same goes for it being too snug, if they tell you need 3 sizes bigger, just go laugh in their faces. If a size 8 won’t zip up all of the way... you don’t need a 14!? but they will try and give you some kinda of crazy logic of why you need it. Trust your instincts.

Now, a piece of advice for all the ladies involved. I generally discourage buying a gown for the size you want to be. I’m all for being optimistic, but I prefer being realistic. If you plan on kicking your butt and losing weight, then do it, but I don’t suggest going more than 2 sizes lower than your recommended size. I think it really does depend on your own personal motivation and sticktoitiveness.

Until we meet again, stay bridal and beware the wedding week weight drop. Please keep eating. I’m serious, your dress slipping right off of you is not a chic style statement... it’s a funny youtube video.

Lauren

Some things to ask a photographer and consider

We asked one of our local favorite photographers to share some images, some insight as to what the most important questions to ask when interviewing a photographer and tell us a little more about them! Here is what Scott Hopkins Photography said:

1) Make sure you ask to see some slideshows or albums that showcase a clients wedding day.  Also, ask to see a complete wedding from a client or two.  It is easy to show 20-40 nice images on a website, but what about the rest of the day?  Is the work on the website representative of the full set of images you can expect?

2) Are you getting two photographers or one?  If two, is the second an assistant or will they be photographing for the entire day?  Are the styles of both photographers similar?

3) Make sure you "click" with the photographer.  They will be with you most, if not all, of your wedding day and you will be working with them after the wedding too.  You should enjoy having the photographer around and not feel like they are intruding.

4) What are you actually getting in a package?  You cannot compare photographers in a spreadsheet.  Comparing photographers is really apples and oranges when it comes to style, vision, personality, and products.

About Scott and Scott Hopkins Photography

Melissa joined me right after we got married in 2008.  I started the wedding business in 2004, but had been doing nature photography since 1 995. Even as a kid I loved photography.  I remember confiscating my mom's point and shoot camera while in grade school and the first time I saw an Ansel Adams print.  It wasn't until college that I made the switch to become a professional photographer.  It was the first thing I ever really had a passion for.  For the first couple of years, I read everything on photography that I could get my hands on.  Capturing a moment in time and the emotional connection to that specific moment still amazes me.  I can look at a landscape or wildlife photo of mine from twelve years and recall almost everything about the moment, the weather, who I was with, what I was feeling, the smell of the land and air, I am transported to that moment.

Favorite Moments as a Photographer

“We have lots favorite moments of the wedding day, these are just a couple of them.  The few minutes at the start of the ceremony when the bride and her father are alone and waiting to walk down the aisle.  There is often amazing emotion as dad thinks about his little girl being all grown up.  Another is the first dance.  The big introduction of the newly wed couple leads them to the dance floor and all eyes are on them.  Emotion fills the room, mom, dad, grandparents are all watching, the couple is lost in the moment, it can be really beautiful.” –Scott Hopkins

All images by Scott Hopkins Photography

Question: Hi Morgan, I am trying to figure out how to give my caterer the final counts to get my final bill from the bartender, caterer and rental company, but don't know how to classify my guests. Some are too young to drink but too old for kid’s meals, some are too young to eat at all but need a booster, and some adults that are old enough to drink, don't drink----HELP. Thanks! Angela

Answer: Hi Angela! I know that giving final counts can be confusing but that is why you have a wedding planner right! It is super important that you get your RSVP’s back in time to get all of these handled yourself and updated contracts if you don’t have a wedding planner. If you do, they should take care of all of it! We always tell our clients the following:

Caterer:

0-3 Kids-Parents usually will bring something with them or feed off their plates. No need to include them in this count.

4-12 Kids Meals-Chicken Tenders, Pizza, etc. Your wedding planner and caterer should go over the options with you and remind you that they are much cheaper than your adult meals.

13 and Up- Adult Meal unless the younger kids as for a kids meal specifically

For the bar:

21 and over guests-Drinking

Guests that don't drink or are pregnant, your bar vendor will classify these guests as 21 and under (sodas, juice, non-alcoholic)

Rentals:

You will need to check with parents about what their kid’s seating requirements are. Normally if they can sit up at a table you might need a highchair or a booster chair. They do not need a full place setting though. So you can take them out of the glass, charger, silverware, and china count.  You should still leave room for them at a table though. There needs to be room for a stroller if need be.

I hope this helps!

 

I know how I feel on this subject, but I thought I would reach out to my facebook compadres to see if the general public felt the same. So perhaps I surround myself with friends like me, but it seems that most rule in favor of “not” covering up. I know it can be a touchy subject. Perhaps it’s mom or dad who is requiring the cover up or maybe it’s something you don’t want to share with the in-laws just yet. Surprise!

   My personal take is do exactly what YOU want because you are the one looking at the photos for the rest of time.  I love my tattoos and nothing in the world would’ve made me cover them up. I have more now then I did then, but I wouldn’t cover them either! My facebook buddies mostly all agreed saying, “Why would you have them in the first place if you’re just gonna cover them?” and “Personally I’m letting aaallll mine show...well the ones I can show anyway.” One friend, who I wouldn’t expect this from, said she is going to get a tattoo on her beack before she’s married saying, “if I have to change my awesome last name(King), I get a crown on my back to keep a part of it.” It’s going to be her last single act! I love it.

I only had one buddy chime up in favor of covering. Saying that while she loved her tattoos her vision of a bride is “simple, pure, classic kind of look... and tattoos aren’t really in the picture for me.” I once had a friend tell me that she would cover up at any formal event where all eyes were on her because her tattoos weren’t for other people, they were for her only. I dig it. And I can totally understand covering a tat that you hate or plan to remove. Brands like Dermablend make ah-mazing coverups for tats. But the best advice I can give is to pay someone to airbrush them away. It may be expensive and time consuming, but it will look the most natural and it will stay put ALL day!

Another friend sent me a like to the Offbeat Bride site. It’s a great site for anyone who is looking to do anything a bit different at your wedding. It’s full of spunky brides and rad ideas.

Until we meet again, stay bridal and let your body art shine!!!

Lauren

Q. Morgan, I have been told by my photographer that we should considering seeing each other before the wedding. But I am somewhat traditional and don't know if I like the idea of ruining that first moment as I walk down the aisle. What is your take on it and what are the pros and cons of each?—Tonya

A.Tonya, I am for the first look! But this is ultimately up to the couple. However, before you make your decision, let me explain why I am PRO-First look!

Logistically here are some pros:

• More time for you both to enjoy your cocktail hour after the ceremony, as you aren't rushing off to take an hour worth of pictures.
• Guests aren't waiting for your arrival for too long. If guests wait longer than 45-1 hour, then it is almost considered rude and inconsiderate. They are there to see you….there is no need to keep them waiting that long.
• Breaking the tension and ice before. This can easily calm nerves and allow for better pictures in general!
• More one on one pictures. You don't want to get caught in the photography game of making sure your great Aunt Betty has a picture with you guys and cut down on your time to take pictures as a couple and only a couple.
  • I say this to all of my couples all the time: I feel that the pictures you two take together are some of the most important aspects of your wedding. I loved my wedding photographer but we have only a few pictures of Tim and I together due too much going on and lack of time. It is one of my biggest regrets at my wedding that we didn't do more or have this moment. (that is a different blog post for a different day!)
• THE BEST pictures: Let me explain and I am sure my photographer friends would agree:

There is this moment when it is just the two of you…no one else……(no priest, no guests looking at you, no bridesmaids or groomsmen laughing or nudging him as you walk down the aisle to him) that happens. It is magical and the moment ccan only be caught in its entirety in a first look. Of course this moment will happen when you walk down the aisle but it is MUCH harder to capture in its entirety and the moment is shorter lived because you are now entering the moment of the actual wedding. And while you might be able to exchange a few words under breath, it doesn't get to come full circle until after the wedding ceremony and you have a private moment. But not…it is almost now a different moment. The moment of “sharing together for the first time as husband and wife”.

Logistically here are some Cons:

• You would need to scheduled your appointments for hair and makeup a little earlier
• Your photographer would probably need to start earlier so it could mean more hours essentially if you want them to go to the end of the night.
• You would need about 30 minutes for the first look so that means you might want to schedule to touch up makeup/hair afterwards if the weather is a bit sticky outside!
• You are now alternating the first time you see each other from when you walk down the aisle to now and some parents might have a issue with this non-traditional concept. 

I would most definitely opt for the more intimate and lasting moment when the two of you see each other and only each other for the first time in a first look. Trust me you wont regret it and you wedding will mean just as much as you thought it would (pending you dint didn't do this) to you both and there will still be those butterflies the minute you begin you walk down the aisle towards him. I PROMISE!

Q: We are having a lot of out of town guests come into Savannah, GA for our wedding and a lot of them are going to be here on Friday before the wedding. What is the proper etiquette when it comes to inviting them to the rehearsal dinner festivities?-Brenda

A:  Hi Brenda- The short answer is yes, you should include any guests that will be in town the day before your wedding after all they are travelling to celebrate your very important day! Inviting them to be a part of the weekend’s festivities allows them to feel even more included in your wedding. TIP: It makes getting around to see everyone personally a little easier and quicker at the wedding-leaving more time for fun with your hubby!  But there are a few different options if the budget doesn't permit for feeding a 100+ guests both nights or you don't want a repeat of the same festivities two days in a row minus you in a wedding dress.

1. You can just host the actual dinner for those involved in the rehearsal (bridal party, family, etc) and then open the invite to your out of town guests for desserts and drinks following your dinner. This way they are free to stop by and see you but having a few desserts and a drink wont blow your budget!

2. Have a hor’s dourves rehearsals dinner! This way you can make it a “STOP BY BETWEEN THE HOURS OF _____ and _____” and just have a number of finger foods for everyone to enjoy.

3. Open the dinner to everyone and just have a more interactive rehearsal dinner. Try a low country boil! We are after all, in the south!

4. AND……if you want a really fun option…..then host a private pub crawl or ghost walk after your rehearsal dinner with an open invitation to all out of town guests…

I hope this helps and remember to always extend the southern hospitality that we are so well known for…the more the merrier!

Photo by Geoff L Johnson

Q: It’s so HOT in Savannah during the summer but we wanted an outdoor July wedding. With that said…I am a bit hesitant about wearing a long dress, but not sure about a short one. What do you think?

A: If you are willing and have the time to find the right dress, then I am all for a cute cocktail or tea length dress. It would be perfect and cool! Just because you are picking a shorter then floor length dress, doesn't mean that you have to loose the look of a wedding dress and the elements that you would normally be attracted to. These days, shorter dresses are becoming more and more popular so a lot more designers are opting to sell/design a number of them in their lines. BUT be careful because there are some dresses out there that look like you are going to your high school prom…but these below by Priscilla of Boston are sassy, chic and refined. 

Q: Morgan, do I have to pick out all my reception songs? My DJ gave me a huge list of songs but it is daunting to go through! -Mandy

A: Hi Mandy, it is quite a simple answer of NO, but the explanation might be more of what you are looking for. Here is the thing…a GOOD DJ will be able to gage your audience throughout the night and pick the appropriate music accordingly. If he sees that a particular genre of music is keeping the dance floor busy…they will continue with something similar to ensure that it continues to be the case. The last thing you want to do is limit and dictate exactly what they must play because it just might not flow or be what entices your guests to get their boogie ON!

My advice is simple:

-Pick the songs you want your important dances to be to as well as a genre of music if you are having a cocktail hour. (IE. Soft Rock-Michael Buble, Jack Jonson or Jazz-Etta James, Duke Ellington, etc)

-If there are songs that you know you HAVE to hear before the night is over, jot them down and give them to your wedding planner or the DJ ahead of time to ensure they can get the song and fit it into the night for you.

-List the songs you most definitely DO NOT want to hear played (chicken dance, polka, etc) This list will be pretty easy compared to picking out each and every song you want to hear. TIP: Ask the DJ to let you know if a guest happens to request a song you have asked him not to play and then make the call.

-Allow your guests to make requests if they would like. Merely let your DJ know it is ok as long as it falls into your realm of what is OK to play. (Granny is going to be there don't forget and you might not want her hearing “Baby got back!”

-Let your wedding planner create your reception timeline with you and let them discuss with your DJ. I know that we go over all names, pronunciations, and timing of all events with them prior to the wedding to ensure things go perfectly smoothly!

Then get your dancing shoes ready…because if your guests see you on the dance floor having fun---they are going to join you! There is nothing worse than an empty dance floor…

Is that the question?!?

Veil...

With a heavily decorated dress, it is best to maintain balance by keeping the veil clean and simple.





On the other hand, if you have a simple dress, an ornate veil might be the perfect touch you're looking for!


TIP: If you don't feel comfortable wearing the veil throughout your whole wedding day, you can take it off after the ceremony! When choosing a veil, whatever you do, make sure it's exactly what you want and how you want it! Make sure you test it out, and take it with you to your trial wedding hair appointments. EXTRA: Your wedding planner should have lots of extra hairpins to help with the possible fly aways that might result in taking it out. So if you decide that a veil is best for you, then go for it! After all, when else in your entire life will you be able to wear one?!






No veil...









If the veil or the headband isn't your thing, try a few simple flowers in your hair that match your bouquet. This is a great way to add a touch of color to your overall look! Make sure you pick a flower that will hold up in all conditions. You will have it in your hair for hours, through lots of hugs and tons of dancing!





Choose a hair style and hair accessories that fit YOU and your wedding style! No one else will even notice or care if you are wearing a veil or not, as long as you are comfortable and confident in what you choose! It's your day to look and feel beautiful!

XOXO
Sarah

Photo Credits:

www.jcrew.com
http://www.bridalfashionmall.com/index.html
http://www.theknot.com/
http://www.designsbykristen.com/index.html